Random Thoughts

I won another contest this last week! This one was a bracelet giveaway by Brenda for the Fitness Friday Time Capsule post! This handmade beaded bracelet is really lovely and I've already worn it several times since I got it in the mail last Saturday. Posting about it today, I've learned something: it is very hard to photograph your own wrist and not have the picture be blurry. I took thirteen photos trying to get a perfect one, then gave up and used the first one I took after all!

In other news, Andrew now scoots and spins on his back! I think he can only do it when he is under his play gym and can hold onto a handing toy, but now that he has had a taste of moving around it won't be long before he realizes he can roll and scoot on his own!

Speaking of Andrew, I have started to let him cry it out more at night. Last night, he woke up to eat at 4:00 AM, and after I fed him, he was having none of this whole "going-back-to-bed" thing. He has also been fighting me on his morning nap and at bedtime. He went from a baby who went down for 2-3 naps and bedtime with relatively no problems, to this super fussy baby after these ear infections. He is no longer having ear pain, and I am sick of constantly getting a crying baby who should be sleeping and rocking and rocking and rocking, so at 4:30 this morning, with the crying keeping us from sleep, I asked Jerry, "Should I let him work it out?" When his response was, "You're going to have to eventually." I knew it was the time. ::sigh:: I know it won't take long because he was putting himself to sleep before all the illness, and I know that he has to learn to sooth himself, but this is hard on a mama's heart!

Finally, I had written that I was wanting to add more coconut to my diet. I have been doing that mostly with coconut oil so far and have really seen my appetite regulate with this and my poor, abused metabolism start to come to life. I decided it was time to add a new thing, so I made Coconut Corn Soup for lunch yesterday! It was so yummy! I was talking with my mom before I made it and described it to her. She thought it sounded yummy, and I knew I would have enough, so I invited her to come have lunch with us. So imagine my horror as I served up my soup and my husband reveals through a look of horror on his face with his first bite that he doesn't like coconut!! What? Who knew? We have been married for 11 years and I had no idea he didn't like coconut. Unfortunately for him, he was at a table with my mom and kids in addition to me, and Aaron was balking at the soup too, so he had to eat it! I felt bad for him because it was obvious that he really didn't like it. However, now I have a dilemma - I am wanting to add more coconut, and my husband doesn't like coconut. This could be problematic! Anyway, try the soup - it's really great!

Coconut Corn Soup

• 1 can whole coconut milk (not lite)
• 4 cups chicken stock (I used homemade - yum!)
• 28 oz. fire-roasted chopped tomatoes
• kernels from 4 ears of corn (I used 2 c. frozen)
• 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
• 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme (I used marjoram because I was out of thyme!)
• sea salt and ground pepper to taste (I used about a teaspoon of salt and no pepper)
• I added about 1 c. shredded chicken leftover from making the chicken stock

Place all ingredients in a large pot over medium heat, bring to a simmer, and cook for 10 minutes.

Fitness Friday - Summer Edition

(daffodils in my front yard that have decided summer is already here)

(cue light and airy music with chirping birds) (In cheesy announcer voice) Ahh, the sweet days of summer. How we enjoy the warm air, singing birds, blooming flowers, and buzzing bees. Notice the smiles on all the faces, and (cue "Psycho" shower scene music) cellulite on the thighs of the fat and thin alike!!!! Run for cover! The cellulite is taking over!

Well, that pretty much sums up how I feel about summer. Oh, and it's really, really hot. Obviously summer isn't my favorite time of year. However, whether I like it or not, it is just around the corner. So when Brenda made this week's topic to be how we are preparing for summer, I cringed. But I shouldn't, because this year I actually am preparing for summer physically. Remember my goal about having sandal ready feet? I am faithfully working on it, and have kept my toenails painted ever since then (which my husband really likes!). I am also eating healthier and losing weight, which will help with the "I cannot stand the way I look in this outfit" syndrome that always accompanies summer. And as for swimsuits...I feel that they are a necessary evil. I have a modest one piece suit that I wear with shorts. I used to be able to get through an entire summer without wearing one, which was fine with me; but now that I have kids who want to swim but cannot do it alone, my suit is a necessary part of my wardrobe. I should probably actually spend the money to get a decent suit that I like this year, because it does make a difference to wear something that I feel good in.

As for the rest of my goals, I am making slow progress. The last few weeks have been tough as far as exercise because my kids and I have been sick. I am still on antibiotics and now the baby has RSV and bronchiolitis, so I'm pretty worn out. Hopefully I will get more rest as Andrew recovers and get back into my workout schedule. Even so, I lost another pound this week. I am very pleased with that. I am slowly making the transition to more nourishing foods for my whole family. Any of you who have tried to change your kid's diet know it can be tricky, but they are responding well. So far, we have eliminated cold cereal at breakfasts and replaced it with eggs, oatmeal, and toast (not all at the same breakfast). This sticks with them so much better, isn't loaded with sugar and refined grains, and has so many more nutrients. I have also not replaced some of the sugary snack items as we have finished them up. So far, so good!


For more Fitness Friday posts, check out the links at Brenda's site!

Fitness Friday - Time Capsule

Our assignment from Brenda this week was to make a time capsule. This is such a good idea, because real and sustainable health changes can be slow, and this is a great way to see the full impact of the progress that we miss since we see ourselves each day! Here is what I am including in my time capsule:

• a pair of black stretchy pants (These are the kind of pants that no one ever intends to wear, ever. They are dangerous, too, because I could wear those pants now, or 15 pounds heavier and they would still fit. Not good.)
• My measurements
• A picture of my greatest current struggle - chocolate. Don't worry, ladies. It is just the wrapper from the chocolate bar in there. I took it off my son's Valentine's Day chocolate bar, which I have not eaten from at all! Woo Hoo!


• Exercise goals: I want to be strong enough to jog for 20 minutes without stopping to walk, have definite muscle definition in my arms and legs
• A current picture of me. (Top quality photo, too. That's right - I'll be forming classes for photography lessons soon! Clear your calendars!)

This was hard for me to put together because it forced me to truly look at where I am now. It was eye opening, but I need that. For more Fitness Friday posts, visit The Family Revised.

Fitness Friday - Free For All

This week Brenda didn't give us a specific assignment, which is good, because I haven't done anything specific...I probably wouldn't even post at all, but since I missed posting last week because I was out of town, I didn't want to skip this week too! I am still out here - just not doing anything noteworthy!

The last two weeks we have had illness rotate through all three children and me. Currently, me and my oldest son are sick. That has pretty much ruled out all exercise, and good cooking for that matter! We are on the upswing, though. I haven't gone totally off. I did get a roasted chicken to add protein to salads, and today I am making a nourishing chicken stock with the carcass. One huge change I have made in the midst of this is that I have started asking myself before I eat something, "Is this going to nourish my body?" If the answer is no, I am putting it back and finding something that the answer is yes. This means I am snacking on fruit, veggies, yogurt...and not pop tarts, candy...you know, the things my brain thinks I want. Now before you think I've found a cure-all, I just started this yesterday. I'll update you on whether or not it makes a long term difference!

Fitness Friday - Temptations

Well, I didn't really take too much time to think through the assignment this week. My brain really couldn't take too much thinking. I have been sick this week - I am pretty sure it is mostly allergies as the mountain cedar count has been very high and a lot of the people I know started up all at once when the count got high! That alone wouldn't get me down too much, but I am also grieving for a friend whose baby girl died of SIDS this Tuesday. When something like that happens, suddenly figuring out how to justify extra sweets or thinking too much about food at all seems completely unimportant! That kind of perspective has been good for me this week and has made me focus on what is truly important and let the rest go.

But that said, I do need to remain accountable to this commitment for my own sake, so I'll give a brief update. I actually did really well this week. I didn't make it to the gym on Tuesday and Wednesday like I normally do, but I did go Sunday when I normally don't so I still went twice and exercised at home three times. I kept track of my food this week, too. Writing it down helped me to see some gaps and also helped me to see that in many ways I am doing a good job with my food. I lost two pounds this week - the first bit of weight I have lost in about six weeks!

As far as temptations, I am completely tempted by sweets. Other foods don't tempt me too much. I can pass on fast food and fried food, but sweets are my downfall. What has worked for me in the past to keep from this temptation is: lots of prayer, cutting out snacking completely (three meals a day with nothing in between), not buying sweets, and not eating when I am alone. Right now, I am not willing to not have any snacks at all as I have been in the past, but I am doing better with the other things that have worked and will keep working on it that way!

Fitness Friday – Goals

This week, Brenda has encouraged us to blog about our goals. Setting goals is important. When I don't have any goals, I usually find that I don't accomplish much of anything! For some reason, even though I know that about myself, I still don't really tend to set goals for myself. I think this largely stems from the fact that I have a huge fear of failure. If I set a goal, and then I don't meet it, I have failed. That fear is keeping me from accomplishing much more than I currently am, though. It is time to move past the fear and make some goals. So here goes…

Food Goals

• Eat fruit at breakfast and as one snack each day. I used to eat fruit each morning with my breakfast. Somewhere along the way I stopped doing this and didn't add the fruit back anywhere else.
• Eat more raw veggies. Actually, that goal is not really easily measurable, so I will say to eat at least one serving of raw veggies each day.
• Do not eat during my children's nap. Their nap time has always been my "me" time. I relax, watch TV, read, and basically totally indulge myself. For this reason, I have been eating sweets or overindulging when it comes to food. I eat things I would never eat if my kids were watching because they would want some, and I don't like to share my treats! Plus, why should I eat something if I wouldn't let them eat it because it isn't good for them???
  

Exercise Goals

• Go to the gym at least three times a week. I get a better workout at the gym. I am motivated by the people I see – the very unfit motivate me because I know how hard it is to go to the gym when you are extremely unfit and don't look the part; and the very fit motivate me because I see what is possible.
• Exercise at home, even if it is just a little bit, three times a week.
• Continue to add jogging to my walking routine. I have started doing 90 second intervals of jogging when I walk. Tonight I jogged a total of 9 minutes during my 40 minute stay on the treadmill. I'd like to get to where I can actually jog for 15-20 minutes without stopping to walk.
  

Beauty Goals

• Continue nightly deep moisturizing on my very dry and calloused feet so that they are sandal ready by summer. I feel so pretty when I have manicured feet in sandals!
• Lose an average of 1 pound a week.
• Choose a goal outfit. We are going to one of my nephew's high school graduations at the end of May. I will choose an outfit from one of my smaller sizes in my closet that I would like to wear to that graduation ceremony.
  

Spiritual Goals

• Choose and memorize a passage of scripture each month. I have gotten out of the habit of scripture memorization.
• Spend time in the Word daily – even on Sundays outside of church.
• Pray diligently for my husband every day. I am currently studying The Power of a Praying Wife with a small group of ladies. I have read this before, and loved it; but this time I want to really apply it.

There you have it: three goals in each of these four areas of my life. Whew – I am tired just looking at it…but I know I can accomplish each of these goals if I take it one day at a time.

Fitness Friday - Tweaking Your Wardrobe

This week's challenge was to tweak our wardrobes. You know, get rid of the old, falling apart, baggy clothes and to try to dress better. I do feel better when I dress well, and I am always up for a challenge. The fun thing about this is that I was already planning to do what was suggested here, and had already started! I do have to say, I am one of those people who is too vain for my own good sometimes and I do not go out of the house without my hair and make-up done. I am not one to wear sweats - especially in public. So I didn't have many atrocities to rid my closet of. What I needed to do was get the maternity clothes out of my wardrobe! Have you heard the saying, "With your first baby you cannot wait to put on maternity clothes and buy them at the first sign of waist expansion. With the second baby you wear your regular clothes as long as you can before succumbing to maternity clothes. With your third baby maternity clothes are your regular clothes!" Well, guess which baby this was for me??? One of the problems is that a lot of the styles right now look like they could be maternity clothes! You know what I am talking about, right? And maternity clothes are cut to fit a lot more close to the body, so they don't look like over-sized tents any more. So I found myself pulling out maternity clothes still because they are just more comfortable. Not as much the pants, because the panel is a dead giveaway!

Anyway, here's what I did this week. First, I took all my maternity clothes out of the closet. I folded them all up and set aside the ones that are in season now to go to the resale shop and the ones that are not in season I put in a bin to go on my closet shelf until the resale shop is accepting spring clothing. I also went through my regular clothing. I have currently four sizes of clothing in my closet. The vast majority of it is size 10 or 12. Those are the clothes I wear when I am at my right weight. My size varies depending on the cut of the item, so even at my goal weight, I would keep both. I also have a small selection of 14's and 16's that I kept knowing that I had gained 40 pounds with each of my pregnancies and this one wasn't likely to be different... I went through these and tried them on. I found a few things that even though they fit, they looked bad. These went in the pile to be donated (and any maternity clothes that the resale shop doesn't buy will go here, too.) I had just recently bought new undies, so we were good here. Finally, yesterday I went to Target and bought a few new things. I didn't want to spend too much money since I do hope these won't fit for too long, but I do think it is important to have some things that are beautiful and new now so that I feel good about what I am putting on. When these get too big, I'll donate them as well.

(Maternity Clothes ready to go to the resale shop)

(new shirts)

Last week I had gone through the kids room and together with them we decided on lots of toys that could be donated, so our donation pile is quite large now! It does feel good to get rid of excess clutter! And yes, we do store the things we are ready to donate in a bathtub...


As for progress in general, I really stepped up the exercise this week. I went to the gym three times this week (using the treadmill, elliptical trainer, and weights), did an exercise video at home once, and did miscellaneous exercises (sit ups, push ups...) a couple times, too. I am going to start adding a more challenging exercise video on days I cannot go to the gym next week. Last night, I actually sped the treadmill up enough that I had to jog some! It felt really good to push myself to do enough to really work up a sweat and to get really out of breath. I still have some things to work on with my food, but I am starting to notice a small change in my body. No change on the scale though...so this week, in addition to weighing myself, I took my measurements so that I have more than one way to measure progress.


So that's my Fitness Friday update! To see more Fitness Friday posts from other ladies participating, check out Family Revised!

Fitness Friday - What Makes Me Feel Good

This is my first Fitness Friday post since before Christmas and it feels good to get back in the mix. Over the holiday, I didn't really watch what I ate by excluding anything, but rather focused on making sure I ate enough veggies and some fruit each day along with all the yummy holiday stuff that was around. We went on a trip for a bit over a week, and during that time Jerry and I were able to go on two dates (one Andrew was along, one he was not)!! It was really good to be out with my beloved and I ordered a meal and dessert both times (both were dinner dates).

This week I am back exercising. I have been to the gym twice this week, and it feels so good to really work out. I am one who enjoys exercising, but seem to forget this until I am actually exercising! As for progress, since I last posted (was that three weeks ago???) I actually gained one pound. It is not surprising though with the lack of exercise and food free for all. The several afternoons that I sat down with the half gallon of Blue Bell ice cream and a spoon aren't helping either! (If you live where you cannot get Blue Bell, you are missing the best ice cream in the world, and probably missing 5 pounds because of it, as well!) I am confident that now that Andrew is 8 weeks old and I am back at the gym, things will begin to change for me weight wise.

This week's assignment was to write about what makes me feel good. I really had to stop and think about this one and the implications it has on how I live my life. These are the things that make me feel good:

1. Spending carefree and stress-free time with my children.

2. Finishing something I set out to accomplish.

3. Making the bed each day.

4. Getting personal messages via mail, e-mail, or my blog.

5. Having a clean house.

One thing I realized while writing about these things is that I can actually control whether these things happen for me or not! So often I am unhappy, stressed, or in general don't feel good, and it is in these times that I reach for food most often. But I can do things to ensure that I have "feel good" moments throughout the day! Unfortunately, I tend to procrastinate to the point that I am stressed out and can hardly keep my head above water. I am seeing that if I take the time to do the work of making my bed, cleaning up, and crossing items off my to do list, I will feel better and be more available to sit down and enjoy my children or leave personal messages for people, which inevitably causes them to leave one for me! Wow, I'm not powerless over how I feel each day. I can make choices to improve how I feel. Keeping this in mind should help me not need to turn to food to feel better!

For more Fitness Friday posts, go to Brenda's blog The Family Revised.

Fitness Friday - Easy Edition

This week, Brenda is going easy on us and giving us a fill in the blank for our Fitness Friday Post. Since this is only my second week, I guess that is good, because I don't have that much progress to report. I am making much better choices, and I have to say that knowing I had this post to put up today is part of the reason for that. One thing that dawned on me this week is that I was indulging in sweets all throughout the day, but I tell my children that they have to wait for something sweet until after dinner when they have already had all their good food for the day. Why don't I follow my own advice??? Today is the fourth day that I won't eat anything I wouldn't let my kids eat. That has actually cut out a lot of excess!

1.This Christmas I am going to indulge in (meaning enjoy, without guilt, a reasonable amount of) anything. I am not really restricting anything as of now. I had already decided to not try to actively lose weight until January while I am still getting my milk supply established. That has usually evened out for me when my babies are around 8 weeks old. Andrew is 5 1/2 weeks, so when he is 8 weeks, I'll start being a bit more restrictive with my calories.

2. It is my goal to stay away from compulsive eating/overeating.

3. Over the holiday, I am changing my exercise goals to just try to move more. I'm not exercising at all right now, so anything is better than nothing. I will be with family for a week in CO, so I want to try to take some walks when other people can be with my kids!

4. The way I will remind myself to make good choices over the holiday is keep my scripture index cards that I have written out visible.

5. My favorite ornament on my tree is a wooden one in the shape of Texas that says, "Happy Yule Y'all. (Hey, they can't all be about fitness!)

6. Of the progress I have made so far, my favorite thing is that I have actually started making changes. I haven't really made any measurable progress yet, but getting started on something concrete is a huge step in the right direction!

Fitness Friday

Ever since Terry at Breathing Grace started posting her fitness journey as part of the Fitness Friday group, I have thought it was a wonderful idea. I firmly believe that women (and men) who are trying to lose weight/get fit need support to do it - and what can be better than the support of people who not only understand the physical struggle and aspect of losing weight, but also the spiritual aspect of it as well? Now that Drew is 1 month old (can you believe it??), I think it is time to get back on track. Somewhere in the middle of my "restricted activity," I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted. At that same time, I stopped doing many of the things that have kept me on track with my food for the past 2 1/2 years. I also stopped focusing on my relationship with God - and that one is the key. I have struggled with food and binging since I was a young child. I have done crazy things to my body - from gorging myself with sweets to starving myself and exercising to the extreme, even in the middle of the night. The only time I have ever found relief is when I have come to the end of my rope and turned to God. Why must I wait until I have exhausted my own strength before tapping into His? I don't need to get back to where I was 2 1/2 years ago to decide to put it completely in God's hands again. It is time. My strength isn't enough!

About four years ago, God convicted me about my food. At that time, I was hiding food and binging in secret. I was making excuses to be able to be alone with my food and it was coming between me and my husband and between me and God. It had become sin. It had become an idol for me. I realized that Satan had a stronghold over me when it came to my eating. Have you ever done a word study on stronghold? I did once and it is convicting to me that I have allowed something to have control over me (a strong hold on me) rather than holding "strong" onto God. He is supposed to be my stronghold. (That is for another post though!) I wasn't completely ready to deal with this right when I felt convicted, but I did begin to change slowly. About 2 1/2 years ago, I was finally ready to get help. I have made great progress and went 2 years without a binge and a full year with no sugar at all. I lost almost 40 pounds and felt great. Then I let it go, bit by bit - so slowly that I could ignore the danger until it was too late.

Where I am now is that I am seeing how I let go of the things that were helping me. I have reconnected with much of that. I am still not spending time with God as I should and my food is all over the place. I have had a few good days in the last two weeks which is more than I can say for the few months before that. I have not exercised since I was put on restricted activity and I now have 33 pounds to lose. But you know, I am not wanting to do this for the weight loss. I need to get back to what is right. I need to depend on God and not sin in the area of food.

When I first was convicted that my relationship with food had become a sin for me, I started searching the scriptures for verses related to two topics: sin and the consequences of sin, and God's promises to me and my identity in Christ. I wrote down all the verses I found and tonight I read through them and what comfort the Word of the Lord has! I am convinced that if I want to get back to a healthy place with food, I must be in the Word. Psalm 119:11 reminds me that it is when I hide God's word in my heart that I am able to keep from sinning. I also know that when I confess my sin, it is God who blots out my sin and remembers it no more. (Is. 43:25) And although this will be a struggle for me, it is a battle worth fighting. Yet, I am not the one who will truly fight it. I love Deuteronomy 20:4, "For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory." I know this promise was made specifically to the Israelite soldiers, but I take great comfort in the fact that when God expects his people to fight, he does not make them go into battle alone. He also fights for his people! And he promises that when I seek him, I will find him; and when I pray to him, He will listen to me! (Jer. 29:11-13)

So my plan is simple:

• Seek God with my whole heart and commit my days and my food to him.
• In the next few weeks, begin to gently exercise again as my body continues to heal from giving birth.
• Refrain from overeating - especially in the afternoon, which is my "trouble" time each day.

I recognize that this is only a small beginning and that in order to be successful, I will need more specific and measurable goals, but it is a start. Thanks to Brenda for getting this Fitness Friday thing going!